Snowflake Babies

Today I want to talk about snowflake babies.  No, I'm not referring to the cute little white figurines, covered in sharp porcelain shards my grandmother used to collect.  Remember these?

I am talking about the miracle that modern medicine has brought to infertile couples using cryogenics.  I have come to terms with my infertility diagnosis however I still have this need to move heaven and earth to experience pregnancy for myself.  I am certain there are many of you reading this who laugh at my perceived rose glasses view of the miracle of pregnancy.  The nausea, the weight gain, the stretch marks, the constipation, the food aversion, the insomnia, the muscle and joint pain, the heartburn, the stretch marks, gas, itching, swelling, hemorrhoids, fatigue, headaches, dizzy spells, and I'm sure I even missed a few.  I want them ... I want them all.  Even as I read them back aloud, they are not enough to change my mind.

So what if there was a way to adopt and be pregnant at the same time?  Wait, what's that you say?  THERE IS?!

Ever wonder what happens when a couple has completed their family through IVF but unused frozen embryos remain?  I will save you the time on Google and explain!  When couples are left with unused frozen embryos (snowflake babies) they can choose to either have them destroyed, donate them to science or place them for adoption!  The logic here is a little tricky since the law does not technically define an embryo as a baby but it is essentially an adoption.  How cool is that?! 

The adoptive parent's would pair with a clinic and agency that specialize in frozen embryo adoption /transfers and get paired with a donor.  The frozen embryos are then thawed and transferred into the adoptive mother's uterus with the hopes implantation will occur.  Skip over all the hormones and injections and the black and white of it is the baby would be carried and birthed by the adoptive mother, it just would not be hers biologically. 

What a great way to prevent unused embryos from being destroyed while also providing infertile couples the opportunity to experience pregnancy and childbirth. 

While obviously a lot of factors go into play here, (the adoptive mother's health being the most important) it is certainly an option we plan to keep open in the future.  Yay for science :)

Check out their website for more info!

 

Wisdom

Today I am thankful for the wisdom of those who have traveled this path before us.  You know, all you been there and done thats out there.  We have really been touched by the number of people who have adopted or even adoptees themselves that have reached out to us offering advice, assistance and most importantly support. 

Just yesterday a good childhood friend who has first hand experience as an adoptee reached out to offer support and any assistance we may need throughout this journey.  It meant so so much.  I know this may sound silly but the adoption itself is the easy part in our minds.  It is everything that comes after that gives us the butterflies.  We want so badly to do right by our child and show them that they were not given up but rather that we were chosen for them.  We want to do right by their birth mother by giving them the best life possible with complete unconditional love.  We know this path will not be without its difficulties and we're fully anticipating the "you are not my real parents" arguments as some point, however we hope to rely on the wisdom of those who have lived or, are currently living it, to help us through. 

Do you believe in signs?

Today I am thankful for my faith in the lord and the moments that I believe he speaks to me without actually saying a word.  Some call them coincidences, others will say it's the result of wishful thinking but I prefer to believe it is God showing me that he has me in his heart always. 
It's funny that when we decide it's time to stop trying so hard to make OUR adoption plan work and instead pray about our future family and be open to GOD's adoption plan, things begin to happen.
I'm sure many of you were confused about our decision to break things off with our agency before having a replacement in the wings.  We too knew that this was unfortunate timing and would almost certainly result is us spending another holiday season as empty nesters longing for a family, but for some reason, deep down it still felt right.  We (and when I say we I mostly mean I) are planners and for once we didn't have a plan in place.  For now we were leaving it up to God.  We have said from the beginning that this journey isn't about finding a baby quickly it's about finding the right baby and birth mother.  We genuinely want a lasting relationship with our birth mother (should she feel comfortable) because we believe this is in our future child's best interest.  So finding the right match is so important.  This brings me to our signs.
On Monday I made the oh so enjoyable trip back to my doctor's office for the monthly stab in the arse.  I'm not sure if I am getting used to it or the nurse has found my 'sweet spot for shots' (so to say) because I hardly felt it and no discomfort after the fact!  Since we are approaching the end of my Lupron paradise we sat down this time to discuss my options going forward.  So she gives me the whole option low down and then drops the bomb.  Wait for it ... "If you are interested I may have a potential birth mother for you."  HOLY SH*T ... Can you repeat that? ... or pinch me?  Heck, punch me in the freaking face to make sure I am awake right now.  Yup ... that just happened.  Now this is not the first lead we have gotten and the rest did not pan out so we are being cautiously optimistic however it is my firm belief that on Monday, November 26th 2012 God spoke to me. 

While I only heard my doctor's words I've always imagined God to have a good sense of humor so he probably said something along the lines of "See what happens when you let go and let me handle it?"
If you know me at all you know I can be incredibly stubborn and do everything myself (by choice) because I am a slight obsessive compulsive control freak.  Not my most endearing quality but it has .provided countless hours of entertainment for those around me :)  You know, I do what I can :)  Now this sign seemed pretty straight forward but after the feelings the agency left us with we were still a little guarded and uncertain.  Did God get frustrated and give up on us?  Of course not, God is way awesomer than that.  (Yea I said awesomer)  Instead he rented a gigantic flashing billboard and placed it right in front of our faces.  So big in fact that I could read it clearly without my glasses or contacts.  Impressive right?  Curious about said billboard?  I am at work Tuesday and I get an email from hubby that says there is an adoption agency using the community room at his work tonight should he stop in and get information?  Doesn't get more clear than that.  It was like that commercial with the giant green arrow and all you need to do is follow it.  I chuckled a little and said "okay, okay I get it now.  I am sorry for not being patient and trusting in you from the start." 
Today I am thankful for God.  His patience and love are unlike anything else I have ever, or will ever experience.  I am one lucky child of God.  <3

Wole

I have waited all month for this post because on this day 19 years ago my mom gave me the greatest gift ever and to this day I could not be more thankful for her. 

Today I am thankful for my baby sister Lauren Kay (Wole).  Being her big sister has been the best job I could ever have asked for.  She is my baby sister and best friend all rolled into one.  We were pretty much inseparable from the start.

I mean check out this baby ... I know adults who would kill to have hair half this fabulous and she had it practically from birth!  What's not to love?

Being that we are eleven years apart she had the perks of experiencing a few things early ... like getting ready for Junior prom :)

And she never missed a football game cheering on her big sister as I cheered on the team.  And this wasn't just because she was too little to be left at home.  Clearly she enjoyed it right?

When I went away to college she was a little lost but she came to visit me and stay overnight in the dorms.  Man I wish I had a sister that was 11 years older than me.  You get to do all kinds of cool things.

When I came home from college it was like we had never been apart.  We talked on the phone constantly and since I had my own place it was pretty cool to hang out on the weekends doing highly productive things like taking silly pictures of ourselves.

Just because we are getting older doesn't mean we have to actually act like grown ups.  For the record that is chocolate frosting ... I swear.

To this day we watch girlie movies and GH, eat junky foods, talk about boys, complain about grown up things like jobs and bills, challenge one another to competitions (I think my jump wins) ...

... cry when life hands us lemons, act like goons to turn those frowns upside down, and always  always hug it out. 

I love her to pieces and cannot imagine my life without her.  Happy Birthday baby sis, here's to another 19 years of the best friendship a girl could ask for!

PS - I love you the most

Adoption Update

I just realized I haven't updated on our adoption progress since the agency break up announcement.  My bad!  Guess I've been too busy being thankful. 
I wish I had more exciting news to report but we are still in search of an expectant mother to become our birth mother.  We had really high hopes that God would bless us with a new little addition before Christmas this year (even considered writing Santa at the North Pole) but that's not looking to be in the cards for us.  With the crazy busy holiday season it will likely be after the new year before we begin searching for a new agency.  What does this mean in the meantime?
It means we will keep praying for a miracle every morning when we wake.
It means we will keep stock piling baby coupons, free bottles and free formula samples.
It means I will have more time to create all of my nursery DIY projects.
It means we might actually narrow down a few names before baby C arrives.
and ...
It means we need your help more than ever.  We need you to keep sharing our story.  You never know who our story will reach or where we might meet our birth mother.  Please share the link to our blog on your Facebook page and encourage your friends to do the same.  Please share our story with your family, coworkers, anyone you can think of.  We know that special selfless woman is our there just waiting to meet us and all of you hold the key to finding her :)  Sometimes it really does take a village.

Easy Button

Today I am thankful for the conveniences in life.  Far too many things are taken for granted on a daily basis. 

I am thankful for the washer and dryer that kept up like champs during my Laundry-a-thon this weekend.  I have discovered that I am really good at getting our dirty clothes washed and dried but not that great at folding and putting them away.  The 5 baskets of clean laundry that were staring me in the face Sunday morning are a testament to that.  And I haven’t even begun to wash all of the clothes we have for baby C lol. Perhaps another New Years resolution?

I’m also thankful for my vacuum cleaner and all of its pet hair attachments.  Have you tried keeping up with hardwood floors when you live in a zoo?  God Bless my Shark.  I use that thing daily.  No really I do vacuum every single day.  There is nothing worse than tumble Cassie and Bellas blowing down the hall as you walk by.

 

My dishwasher is another reason for giving thanks.  While I don’t use it as often as one would think, I found myself being especially thankful for it as I overheard my cashier at Wal-Mart saying that’s all she wanted for Christmas this year.  When we just can’t stand hunched over the sink any longer or when you need to clear off the counter and clean up a mess in a hurry boy is that thing handy.  And wouldn’t you know it, the washing noise lulls by furry babies right to sleep. 

 (Not our dog but hilarious)

Now I’m taking it back to the basics and being thankful for indoor plumbing.  I really take this for granted until something somewhere gets clogged and I find myself brushing my teeth in the kitchen or washing my face hunched over the tub lol. 

We are so blessed to have clean running water and multiple sinks/toilets.  And while I’m being thankful for clean water I need to add my water cooler to the list.  I was the worst when I came to staying hydrated.  Mostly because tap water always tasted funny.  Remind you of anyone??

I could totally relate when she kept telling her dad it tastes contaminated.  It wasn't until I started my new job and began drinking from the water cooler that I discovered water I loved to drink! Surprisingly, a water service is not that expensive!  We got ours for the same we were spending buying bottled water while doing our part to cut back on plastic bottles and save the environment!  Plus this will be extremely handy for bottles when baby C arrives.  Oh and did I mention that this is where all the gossip goes down in our house?

I'm only kidding but they do say the water cooler is the best place to catch up on the kind of worldly events US Weekly writes about.  I could go on and on with things like heat and electricity  but you get the idea.  I am thankful for every little thing that makes my life easier.   What is it that you take for granted but could not live without??

Football

Today I am thankful for football of all things.  I really truly cannot believe I am saying that.  It took until I was 23 years old for me to really gain an appreciation for the game.  Mostly I guess because I didn’t have a freakin clue how it all worked before then.  In fact I remember thinking on many occasions as a child that I hated having my birthday in October because it meant everyone would come over to celebrate me by sitting in front of the TV and yelling at bad calls or cheering for touch downs.  I am almost ashamed to admit that I was on my high school’s Varsity Cheer squad for football and still hadn’t a clue. 

But in my defense all you really needed to know was when we were on offense, defense or scoring a touchdown.  I would repeatedly ask for someone to PLEASE sit down and explain the game to me so I understood the downs and yardage and penalties etc.  I mean if we were going to scream at the TV, I wanted in!   So bless their hearts for trying but every time my dad, grandpa, uncle or even boyfriend would sit down to explain it we would get as far as the first bad call and the yelling would commence and I would be stuck there saying “What?  What happened?  Hello?  I want to yell too!!!” 

It wasn’t until I found my dear dear husband that I discovered my love for football.  We made it through an entire game with explanations that actually made sense and we love our football Sundays together.   We generally cook a large pot of chili, gather all the clean laundry that needs folding, claim our spots on the reclining sofa and tune in to the Green and Gold. 

How could we be anything other than Cheeseheads when we live in Wisconsin and I have my very own Aaron Rodgers J

Books

Today I am thankful for Books.  I loved reading and being read to as a child.  The characters were always real and the stories never actually ended.  This was the first book I could "read" because it had been read to me enough times for me to memorize it, including the page turn pauses :)

I have so many amazing childhood favorites that it will be hard to decide what to read to our child first!  The characters show you what it means to have a friend.  They stress the importance of please, thank you and even I'm sorry.

Books can help you learn hard life lessons in the safety and security of your own home (or often times in my case, my parent's laps)

And in those moments where you are convinced your parent's know nothing and your only option is to run away where the grass is always greener, they can show you how lucky you really are.

Of course lets not forget the Holiday traditions that books can inspire.  It wouldn't be Christmas for our children without this one.

I am so so so thankful for books!  I am also thankful that my parents saved my favorites all these years.  I have the originals to read to my babies :)   They will be read to often.  They will know the heroes and heroines, the bullies and bad guys, the princes and princesses and everyone in between.

We would love for you to leave us a quick note with your childhood favorite.  That way we can be sure to add it to baby C's growing library! 

 

Social Media

Today I am thankful for social media.  While I do firmly believe that it has changed interpersonal communication for the worst, today is about being thankful. 
Social media has afforded us so many opportunities to really get our story out there.  The number of people who have liked our Facebook page and viewed our blog is amazing.  On the days where we struggle these complete strangers provide support.  During our milestones they rejoice and cheer us along. 
To our friends and family who have shared these pages we cannot thank you enough.  With every 'like' and 'share' you are helping our dream of becoming parents come true.  Knowing that all of you want this dream for us as well is a blessing beyond words, please don't stop sharing!
Thank you, we love you and may God continue to bless you.  <3

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!  I hope that all of you were blessed this Thanksgiving with good friends, loving family and great food.  Today we are thankful for all of the above.  I am especially thankful for my brother in law who hosted Thanksgiving this year.  What a treat to be able to show up and eat :)  We are very blessed and had a fantastic relaxing Thanksgiving.
Now we are back at home getting love from our girls, watching post football coverage and our special cat sprocket be mesmerised by ESPN's ticker ...

Thankful 21

Today I am thankful I'm not a Turkey :)

Love notes

Being that we are into our fourth year of marriage it is not entirely surprising that fewer love notes get exchanged.  It's not that we love each other any less we just get busy and sometimes need to slow down and remember those love note days :P

When we first began dating love notes often meant:

A card left on my dashboard at the end of the work day.  Perks of having the same employer I suppose :)

After we bought the house and lived under the same roof love notes looked like:

A little note left in a familiar place just as a reminder <3

Four years of marriage and 5 animals later love notes look like:

What ... It says Love You at the end right? 

My hubby cracks me up every day and I am so thankful that hasn't changed.  Now all of you go home and leave your honeys a little love note (maybe leave out the Poo part) 

Spoiled Rotten

So many people love baby C already we can hardly believe it.  Not only have we been blessed by the excitement of our friends and family but baby C has made out pretty good too.  Here are a few of the gifts baby C has received already!

Giraffe baby book from Auntie Meghan

Jesus Loves Me book from Auntie Beth

Musical giraffe from Auntie RAR

Soothing Sounds Giraffe from Auntie Meghan

Giraffe ring holder from Auntie MJ.

Perfect for the changing table when mommy has to lotion up baby :)

If you haven't picked up on the subtle giraffe theme, the nursery is all about giraffes.  They are my favorite animal and everything baby that contains giraffes is adorable!  If you don't see your baby C gift here no worries.  I plan to show them off little by little. 

Thank you so much to everyone who shares in our excitement.  We cannot wait to be blessed with a family of our own.  God Bless <3 

Virtual Wallet

Today I am thankful for my virtual wallet.  Online bill pay has saved my behind on more than one occasion during this Lupron memory loss debacle.  Do people even write checks anymore??

I cannot begin to explain how much time is saved by paying bills online.  You can even set them up to pay on certain dates.  FANTASTIC!  To the genius who invented online banking and bill pay today I am most grateful!

Anna

Today I am thankful for our dog sitter Anna.  Anna is our neighbor girl who loves animals and has always wanted a dog of her own.  When we approached her parents 4 years ago and asked if she would be interested in coming over and letting our dogs out once a day we thought we were doing her a favor (since her parents are allergic and can't get a dog) and instead we ended up being the blessed ones.  Our dogs  love her to pieces!  She has taught them to give hugs, paw, and even army crawl for treats.

 It melts my heart on days I am home watching them stand up in the front window to see her walk home from school.   She has been such a blessing. She allows both of us to work long shifts and even run errands on the way home without worrying about the pups.  It will be a sad day in our household when her high school activities become too demanding for her to keep seeing the girls everyday. 

Midday REM

Today I am thankful for naps. 

That is all. <3

Fit for a Giraffe

Today I am thankful for cute clothing that comes in tall sizes.  I know this seems basic however as someone who has (for years) had to hang dry all pants and stretch out the sleeves before hang dying all long sleeve shirts, I am in a word THANKFUL!
If your shower rod looks like this ... you might have ape arms.

If you have one of these hanging in every available hall held up by door framing ... you might have giraffe legs.

It is not easy having giraffe length arms and legs but it's okay because the GAP thought of that.  I am in <3 LOVE <3

So now I have long sleeve shirts that go in the dryer and come out still covering my wrists :D
I have jeans that can be dried on Cotton/Sturdy and still get wear marks from dragging on the ground below my wedge shoes! 
As you may already know from my previous posts I do not shop without a bargain and the GAP tends to be a bit pricey for my budget.  So when I was able to combine two promo codes to save 45% on my latest order it was like Christmas came early! 
If you have ape arms or giraffe legs like myself and don't want to spend the GAP prices, it's all good because Old Navy's got your back too! 

I purchased two of these guys from Old Navy and they are super soft and fit perfect.  I know I will regret this shortly but for now I am saying bring on winter because my wrists and ankles are set :)