Wordless Wednesday

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As Promised

My hubby dearest went on a Bachelor weekend to the Dells this weekend and so I had plenty of uninterrupted time to get reacquainted with the sewing machine.  We are getting close to our fundraising goals for the adoption fees but our main goal is to be fully funded.  So here are the latest baby items for sale to help us reach our goal!

Girl Stroller blanket ($20)

Girl Stroller Blanket ($20)

Unisex Stroller blanket especially for runners ($15)

Boy Baby Bjorn slip cover ($15)

Baby Girl Bjorn slip cover ($15)

If you see anything you like make sure to email us so we can make sure it's yours!

Breaking Biology ...

It is going on 5 years since I made the conscious decision to remove my biological father from my life.  He was like a cancer that would never go into remission.  After enduring years of “My job isn’t to be your cheerleader”, “You’ve been in school for years now and have nothing to show for it”, “What do you feel you’ve done to deserve to be in my family pictures” and to my now husband the first time they met “You realize she’s messed up every relationship she’s ever been in right” … I was beginning to see that this relationship was not healthy.  I know my faults, my mistakes and my short comings and I deal with them daily.   I was unaware that parental unconditional love meant constantly putting your child down. 

The final straw was when he told family members not to attend my wedding, send a card or a gift.  Can you imagine??  Your own father telling other family members not to attend your wedding or even send you a card?!  It happened.  And when I received a nasty letter in the mail yesterday after nearly 5 years of not communicating it confirmed that I had in fact made the right decision for my future.

I have wonderful family members who do support me and who ARE my biggest cheerleaders because they WANT to be.  I have a step-father who is everything I could have ever asked for in a parent and puts my biological father to shame.  If this isn’t a screaming advertisement for the insignificance of biology and genetics I’m not sure what is. 

Some of the most amazing people have come into my life not through biology but rather through marriage, friendships, partnerships, you name it. 

Our child, the child God has planned for us will also not enter our lives through any genetic or biologic connection but rather through a web of love, selflessness, faith and a dash of serendipity.  What’s not to love about that? 

With that being said we are renewing our commitment to this journey.  We have a few different options/plans in place to move forward and are excited to share them when the time is right.  There will also be new baby items available to Etsy very soon, car seat covers, stroller blankets, Baby Bjorn covers etc. 

Thanks for hanging in with us during the lull and stay tuned for some brighter days J

And lastly … a video dedication to celebrate almost 5 years since choosing to stand up for myself and live without my emotional cancer.

TGIF!

It's all fun and games til someone almost loses an eye ... #Nerfshenanigansatwork



Sunshine on a Cloudy Day

A little picture post to show why I think these guys are the greatest ... my sunshine on an otherwise cloudy and snowy day.

Backward parenting?

First of all I need to start this by saying how disturbed I am by Google Image search results for parenting an adult. Do you know PlanB was the first thing that came up ... that's offensive! Okay back on topic ...

Since not much is happening in our journey to parenthood at the moment lets talk about the lessons I've been learning during my pseudo parenting journey.  My 19 year old sister has moved in with us and I'm beginning to think I am learning more from this experience than an infant could ever teach me lol.  Now I say pseudo parenting because she is an adult so there are lots of choices and decisions in her life that I will not be part of but ...



On the list of things I wasn't prepared for ... the first boy to come over to the house.  How do we feel about this?  She is an adult but are boys allowed in her room?  Would my mom allow boys in her room if she still lived at home?  Since I had about 20 minutes to figure out the house rules I decided to uphold mom's rules until hubby and I could discuss it further.  Specifically I told her no boys in your room even if you are just friends ... period.  Easy enough right?

New boy comes in, dogs like him, he introduces himself to me ... all is well.  They decide to play board games so they head to the basement and grab a few games and come back up.  To play these games she doesn't take him into her room ... she takes him into the nursery ... and ... closes the door.  Touche ... you got me there.  I did not specifically say no boys in the nursery, with or without the door closed.  Lesson number one: be incredibly specific when laying out house rules so as not to be caught on a technicality. 



Yep ... she got me.  But I was not about to bow out here ... no ... I am still in charge dammit!  So what does a girl do to maintain the upper hand?  Send in reinforcements of course!  I can think of 2 beautiful creatures whose sole existence is to have my back.  Yep I sent in the furry troops.

They look to be enjoying it right?  It's completely okay to be laughing at me right now.  The situation is a work in progress and I am promise you this will not be the last parenting flop I will have to report.  I am however going to get more creative so perhaps someone should warn her :)





Some days

Some days you just feel like this ...

Handing it over to God

How do you come to terms with your imagined worst case scenario becoming a reality?  You trust in God.  That's the only answer I can seem to come up with and I have been wracking my brain from days now.

I am feeling discouraged and heart broken.  It feels like our dreams of parenthood drift further and further away as each day passes.  I have been patient God ... I have waited years after my peers began their journeys into parenthood.  I have endured Facebook pregnancy announcements by the dozens, I have been to baby showers like it's my part-time job and it seems that the more discouraging my infertility journey becomes the more I become a fertile lucky charm for those around me.  Why God, why is this your plan for my life?  What am I missing? 
I think I have been missing an opportunity to work on my relationship with God.  I have been asking for an awful lot while giving nothing in return.  No adoration or thanksgiving in my prayers, only petition and I'm not particularly proud of it.  But the beauty of our God's grace is that it's never too late. 

You must
You must think I'm strong
To give me what I'm going through

Well, forgive me
Forgive me if I'm wrong
But this looks like more than I can do
On my own

I know I'm not strong enough to be
Everything that I'm supposed to be
I give up
I'm not strong enough
Hands of mercy won't you cover me
Lord, right now I'm asking you to be
Strong enough
Strong enough
For the both of us

 

I can do all things
Through Christ who gives me strength
And I don't have to be
Strong enough
Strong enough