I was thinking we tried way too hard and agreed to far too many compromises we weren't necessarily comfortable with for Courtney and look how that turned out.
I took a couple days to pray about things and began to feel awful for essentially pushing her away. Maybe I was protecting myself? Either way I knew she had been looking at our blog and what if, just what if she had fallen in love with our family and I was pulling the rug out from under her all over again?! I had made a huge assumption thinking she wanted a family closer to her and now I owed her an apology.
I had this overwhelming sense of peace surrounding this connection and really felt like if this baby was meant to be in our family it would work out that way.
I reached out to her again, this time sending a lengthy email. I apologized if I had given her the impression that my husband and myself were not an option for her child. That was never my intention. I was just never going to push her to choose us because I felt very strongly that only she knows what is best for her and that her decision needed to be unbiased and without my influence.
My email was a very honest depiction of our family. My relationship with Don, how our household is run, how we parent, what we stand for and believe in, our faults coupled with our strengths and what adoption means to us. No sugar coating here. If this was going to work she was going to choose us for us.
And I waited ...
No comments:
Post a Comment