How do Fertiles do it again?

To all my fertile friends ... you are going to have to help me out here because I'm a little confused.  You mean to tell me you just got pregnant?  There was no pre-gaming?
You didn't have to take your temperature with a special thermometer each morning before so much as rolling over in bed and then draw a pretty chart with the results? 

You mean there was no pumping yourself full of hormones causing you to cry when someone so much as sneezes near you? 

And you didn't pee on these little sticks that have the nerve to smile at you when "the time is right"?

Your hubby didn't have to participate solo by watching 1970s pornography VHS style with a pretty nurse waiting outside the door to collect his contribution? 

Hmm ... That is sooo weird! 

Are you sure there wasn't a nurse, a reproductive endocrinologist, and two medical students in the room with you and your husband while your legs were in stirrups?

And you didn't have to take it easy afterward? 

Wait ... what's that??  You just shaved your legs, went to Denny's, came home, kissed for a while, turned the lights out and woke up pregnant??   Man does that sound boring.